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Psycho Froggy - Assassin Extraordinaire!!Use the categories menu to read my story from the beginning...... May 23 Joe had a baby!I think that you may have guessed by now that I don't update this page anymore. Psychofroggy has finally retired. However, if anyone who knew me in this incarnation is interested, I have had a baby girl. Her name is Dylann. She is wonderful and is currently taking up a great deal of my time! Her blog can be found at http://joeandstevebabygirl.spaces.live.com/. I would like to thank the few people who read this blog for making me feel (erroneously, no doubt) that what I wrote was actually interesting!
Lots of love
Joe xxx August 20 TadpolesFroggy is having tadpoles and has therefore hung up her crime-fighting, evil-one chasing webbed boots. She hopes that some other crime fighting hero/heroine will find and destroy her nemesis ... preferably before she gives birth.
Take Care All xx March 07 Seriously indisposed froggy........Froggy has been seriously indisposed for the past few months. THE EVIL ONE had infiltrated her defences by using a particularly insidious poison. As a result, she is currently recuperating in an undisclosed place. However, she hopes to return to her former strength in the near future. She has asked me to thank everyone who wished her a happy Christmas and New Year and to apologise for her extended absence.
Joe x
November 28 Into the City......As I passed the burnished guards a whole new world opened up in front of me. The sights, the smells, the sheer exuberence and noise of city life - all were new to me. Looking back, I cannot believe how quickly such strangeness can become commonplace.
The gates opened up onto a crowded street. Everywhere I looked I was surrounded by multi-hued frogs of every race and nationality. The sheer variety was staggering. I had never seen so many frogs in one place before. I was, indeed at heart I may still be, a small pond frog. With trepidation I moved into the street. Immediately I was assailed by a plethora of sounds and smells, the majority of them intensely unpleasant to my unaccustomed senses. The dwellings in this part of Frog City were crude and somewhat dirty. Indeed, noone from my home pond, not even in the deprived area from which I originated, had ever lived in such filth as seemed commonplace in Frog City. I had believed, in my innocence, that such a famous city must be awash with the trappings of the rich and powerful. It came, therefore, as something of a shock to discover the sheer depths of poverty in the capital of our great frog nation. As I made my way along the thoroughfare I saw groups of ragged and hopeless citizens. Their beaten and helpless visages contradicted every belief of hope for the future that I cradled within my heart. And yet, despite the rag-tag mob, the depressing domiciles, I was still fascinated by and drawn to the vibrant pulse of the inner city. It was as if everything within Frog City, every individual, building, plant was drawn by an inexorable tide ever onwards towards the centre.
I chose not to resist the pull. Following the flow of city denizens I made my way slowly through the crowded streets. As I made my slow but steady progress along the cobbled byways, I percieved a gradual change in the buildings surrounding me. More and more often the domiciles seemed to display the affluence of their owners. The smells of the city became less pungently offensive and the frogs moved, for the most part, with a far greater sense of purpose and self assurance. I plucked up the courage to ask one such citizen for directions to the academy. I was, I must confess, a little surprised to see the look of fear that he shot me before rattling off a few stammered directions and hurrying in the opposite direction to which he had suggested I move. With hindsight I can understand the reaction. I had, then, no comprehension of the terror that members of the academy often inspired in the ordinary citizens of frog city. This was something that I was to learn the hard way.
Taking the road pointed out to me by my unwilling helper I found myself at the gates of the Montgomery T Frogmont School for Trainee Assassins.....
November 15 UPDATESI have been asked about when I will be updating my story. I realise that I have been terribly lax about this, but the quest to destroy THE EVIL ONE has recently become terribly exciting and I find myself with little spare time on my hands. Hopefully I will be able to tell more within the next few days...... October 06 Inside the walls......I approached the gates of Frog City with a measure of trepidation. Despite my commitment to revenge, this was indeed a great upheaval for a quintessentially small-pond frog. The soldier-frogs standing to attention by the gates seemed gargantuan, their muscular hind legs gleaming in the autumn sunlight. They were veritable gods in their military regalia. I felt, I am now somewhat ashamed to admit, a little intimidated by these denizens of City authority. Had I known then what I know now about the corrupt nature of government and army politics, I have no doubt that I would have felt far easier approaching these statuesque and gleaming guard-frogs.
As it turned out, gaining admission to the City was relatively unproblematic. I was required to sign a register and declare my reasons for entering the city. Having stated that my aim was to join the Assassin's Academy I was given a seven day pass allowing me freedom of movement within the boroughs of Frog City. Should I be accepted by the Montgomery T. Frogmont School of Trainee Assassins, I would be required to report back to the gate guards within this period bearing evidence of my vocation and proof that I had been assigned a place of habitation.
I was in.
Having recieved directions to the Academy from one of the guard frogs I set about my first foray into city life. September 29 Destination: Frog cityThe journey to Frog City was, to say the least, somewhat arduous. I had never before been far from my pond. As I moved towards my destination, I swear that I discovered muscles in my back legs of which I had no prior knowledge. And they hurt. Alot. Even so, I had a reason for my travails and I had no intention of giving in to the discomfort. Suddenly my life had regained its meaning.
Ambrose would be avenged.
I suppose that in the story books my journey would have been a thoroughly exciting event, interrupted by bandits and needy travellers or by attractive boy-frogs in need of rescue. Unfortunately, I cannot lay claim to such fairytale glories. My journey was, by all accounts, very wet. Even so, as I travelled, I believe that I saw for the first time the beauties of autumn. The golden leaves, the scent of wet grass.....for me these were new experiences. I guess you could say that my loss had opened my eyes to the wonders of the world around me. Ever present was a sense of emptiness, a feeling that all of these amazing sights, smells and sounds could have better been appreciated if shared with my love. I can only compare this to a persistant itch underneath my skin. No matter the wonders surrounding me, I could not assuage the underlying pain.
3 weeks after leaving the pond I arrived, a bedraggled and rather fragrant froggy, at the walls of Frog City. September 23 A new beginning for PsychoDespite having decided upon a course of action, I had no idea of how I would locate the masked assassin - never mind how I would destroy him. I had to assume that this frog was a trained killler and that in a face to face confrontation I would most likely come off worst. After a great deal of deliberation I realised that the only way to gain my revenge was to play a long game. Despite my earlier foray into the world of poisons I was not a yet a killer. To destroy my enemy I must, of necessity, become him.
My grief transmuted into rage, I gained the motivation I needed. I knew that there was only one place in which I could learn my new trade ..... The Montgomery T. Frogmont School for Trainee Assassins - affectionately known by students as Monty's.
Monty's was a long established institution in Frog City. Initially designed to provide the government with an elite team of assassins it had gained private funding from a number of rich "business-frogs" who operated on the fringes of the law. It occasionally occured that one of these frogs wished to see a rival competitor "disappear", but didn't want to be implicated himself. Monty's graduates would arrange such "disappearances" for a fee agreed by the school. The government turned a blind eye to the extra curricular activities of the Academ, mostly - it was rumoured - because it meant that they did not have to foot the increasingly large running costs of the institution.
My mind made up, there was no time to lose. I packed my meagre belongings in a small knapsack and left on my journey towards Frog City. I knew that the next time I returned to my home I would be a very different frog.
I didn't look back once. September 09 despairFor weeks and months following the death of my beloved I became a hermit. I hid behind a rock, blind and deaf to the world around me. I ate only that food which flew in to my immediate vicinity. Catchinng food was not a concious, but rather a reflex action. Cliche tho' it may be, I think I had lost the will to live. My existence, so briefly illuminated by my love, had plunged back into a turgid mire of despair.
I was haunted by dreams of Ambrose's dead face. My subconcious relived his death numerous times. I saw the masked visage of his assassin, the blowpipe raised to his mouth ... the fatal shot....
One night I dreamt that I had reached THE EVIL ONE in time. I felt satisfaction, nay pleasure, as I reached for his throat and squeezed. For the first time since the murder of my beloved I did not feel empty.
I had found a reason to live.
Revenge. August 14 Lethal encounterHave you ever heard the expression "A date with destiny"? I had always considered it to be a rather silly thing to say and yet a few minutes of a previously insignificant day were to change the entire course of my life. It was a Friday afternoon and I had joined Ambrose and his family for a quiet lunch at an exclusive lilypad-restaurant. Unbeknownst to the restaurant owner, we were checking out the restaurant to see if it was an appropriate venue for our wedding. And it was. It was the most beautiful place that I had ever eaten in. Flowers surrounded the entrances and each of the lily pads was gilded with a gilt edging. I was ecstatic - and Ambrose was tolerant of my enthusiasm. We decided that this was indeed the place in which our nuptials should be held.
The main course was exquisite. Excellently prepared and beautifully presented. At first I felt a little uncomfortable being in such an upmarket establishment. They had nothing like this at my end of the pond. However, the ease of conversation (coupled with some lubrication from alcohol) led to my feeling far mor at home in this place than I ever could have imagined. As we were coming to the end of our meal, the Mayor was talking about his policy for education. Ambrose became very animated on the subject. It was his opinion that his father ought to extend provision of free schooling to the porer areas of town immediately. Ambrose believed firmly in a comprehensive education where rich and poor children would be educated together in the same schools. His father felt that this would provoke resistance in many of the richer families and believed that, initially, at least, schools should be set up in the poorer end of the pond which would exclusively be attended by the children from that neighbourhood. Personally, I was just happy that schooling would be available to frogs from my background. I sat back and let the conversation flow over me - just happy to be with the frog I loved. I think that this was why I was the first to spot the dark shape lurking, partially concealed, behind a cluster of reeds near to the entrance of the restaurant. As I turnned to get a better look at this shape, it began to move. I could see that it was a small frog, clad entirely in black - including a hood over his face. The frog's front leg moved towards his mouth and I could see that he was holding some kind of tube. At this point the hooded assassin had not realised that I had seen him. as he tok careful aim at the Mayor I leapt backwards - screaming a warning. With an almighty leap I headed in the direction of our assailant - but too late. he had already fired a dart through his blow pipe. Seeing my approach he turned and fled. At the same moment I heard a high pitched shriek and turned to see the mayor and his wife standing over Ambrose's prostrate form. I was later to find out that as I shrieked my warning, Ambrose, seeing that the assassin was aiming for his father, had jumped to knock the Mayor out of the dart's path. Unfortunately he had mistimed his leap. He saved his father's life - at the expense of his own.
I rushed to my beloved's side. As I reached him and bent to touch his ashen, waxy face, he smiled at me and then his eyes glazed over and he was gone. I let out a yell of rage, defiance and pure agony. I felt like my whole reason for being had been ripped from me. The pain was physical - as if I, myself had been shot with the poisoned dart. It had only been moments since the attack and I could see that all of the other frogs in the restaurant were frozen either with terror or confusion. It turned out that very few customers had actually seen our assailant. They were unsure about what had actually happened. I raced out of the restaurant desperate to find the frog who had done this to my Ambrose. But it was too late. The masked assassin had disappeared.
This had been my first encounter with THE EVIL ONE, as I was later to dub the killer of my love. I was left desolate.
August 13 Town politics........Ambrose and I began to plan our life together. Our families got to know each other. My family, of course, you are already somewhat acquainted with. My mother had struggled to provide for us as we grew up alone under the shadow of my absentee father. My siblings, nowadays, held me in esteem, because they believed that I had saved them from an awful plague. Ambroses' family was a different matter altogether.
I had not realised it as I observed Ambrose from afar, but his father was an important public figure - the Mayor of our small town. His policies were considered to be somewhat revolutionary. He wanted to change the way in which our community lived. He advocated free education for all frogs - no matter what their social standing. Hell! The frog even tried to pass a law decriminalising prostitution - although the moral majority in the town managed to shout that one down. Needless to say, he came up against a great deal of opposition. Even so, Ambrose's father was in general beloved by the local populace. He was a fair and tolerant frog whose door was always open to those with a point to be made. This fairness and tolerance of others, however, was to prove to be his downfall.
I should, at this point, explain a little bit about the economic situation of our town. Its very simple. The rich lived upstream, the poor downstream. There was an obvious social divide. The poor area was far larger than that of the rich and yet it was the rich area that had all of the amenities: schools; hospitals; movie theatres and so on. All of these were privately owned and no one could recieve an education or gain access to hospital treatment unless they could pay for it. All of these amenities, along with all of the businesses in the town, were controlled by one very rich family - the MacFroggers. The patriarch of this family, Alun MacFrogger, had his webbed foot in just about every pie going. MacFrogger had a serious objection to the policies of Ambrose's Dad. If the Mayor had his way then MacFrogger stood to lose a great deal of money. The events which follow should, therefore, have come as no surprise to us. Unfortunately, that was not the case...........
August 12 The calm before the storm.....Now, I do not intend to regale you with endless descriptions of the relationship that I had with the beautiful boy-frog. His name, incidentally, turned out to be Ambrose. I will not go into depth about our relationship, mostly because the memories are too painful for me. Suffice it to say that from the moment of his liberation from the giant human's net we were inseperable. We made plans for the future. A wedding was discussed. Late at night, sitting beneath the soft glow of the stars, we would talk about the tadpoles we would raise and the great works that we would accomplish together. I loved him to distraction and I truly believe that he felt the same way about me. I can say, in all honesty, that I had never been so happy and nothing I have experienced since has even approximated the joy and wonderment that I felt when I was with my lover.
As I have mentioned, Ambrose and I did everything together. You could not find one of us without the other in close proximity. It is no surprise, therefore, that he should have been at my side upon the date of my first encounter with THE EVIL ONE. August 11 finally.... in our darkest hour a meeting is achieved.One morning as I crouched in my hiding place observing the intelilgent boy frog - desperate for a means of introduction - I heard a commotion from further down the pond. Frogs, fish and sundry other aquatic pond dwellers were rushing pell mell towards me. Shifting my position I tried desperately to see what had caused such widespread panic. As I watched I felt the ground begin to shake beneath me. Huge tidal waves of water thundered across the surface of my beautiful habitat. But what was causing this destructive force?
Soon, all became clear. Behind the tidal wave were two giant beings splashing around in our home. They were carrying giant nets on the end of sticks. I didn't realise it at the time, but this was to be my first encounter with human beings. As I cowered in the safety of my hiding place I watched as they dipped these nets into the pond, dragging them out again and deposited their contents into huge glass receptacles. I was terrified. I glanced over to the rock only to see that my beautifuul boy-frog had been knocked from his seat and had fallen into the water. His book had been flung towards the giants as he fell. Frozen with fear I watched as he struggled against the tide to retrieve his property which had become entangled in some pond weed. As I watched the net came down.......................and he was captured.
It may seem to be a cliche, but in that moment my world went into slow motion. I watched in horror as the net scooped him up and moved towards the dreaded glass jar. Without thinking I utilised the strength of my hind legs. I sprang into action. I don't believe that I had ever before, or indeed have ever since, achieved a jump of such power or distance. I collided with the face of the giant as he bent to empty the net into his jar. As I rebounded from the pinkish expanse an excruciatingly loud and high pitched noise emanated from its gaping maw. The beast dropped the net and stumbled backwards, landing with an almighty thud on the bank at the side of the pond. Quickly I swam to the edge of the net and grabbing the foreleg of the boy-frog I enticed him out of his prison. Quickly we sprang into hiding in the undergrowth.
Our meeting had been accomplished. From that point on we were to be inseperable........... August 10 To watch from afar.....I have been told by many of my peers that, despite my diminutive stature, I am an attractive frog. Even if I do say so myself, my skin glistens in a most unusual golden-green manner when the sunlight hits it. My eyes protrude just enough to be considered attractive - but not so far as to make me appear blatently sexual. The musculature in my hind legs, when shown to its best advantage, has often been remarked upon as something to which other female frogs should aspire My most appealing feature, however, has always been my ready wit. The problem I now faced was how to introduce myself to the sexy-but-intellectual frog I had spied reading his book about quantuum physics. I wanted him to realise that I was not a bimbo-frog who was just interested in his (exceptional) good looks and it was important that he saw past my exterior and realised that here was a frog whom he could regard as his intellectual equal.
I toyed with many plans as I observed him from my hiding place. I could simply amble over and engage him in conversation - perhaps about the topic of the book in which he seemed so engrossed. Although on first examination that seemed like the most sensible plan, it was somewhat stymied by the fact that my scientific knowledge (other than my burgeoning understaning of how to make poisons) was sadly lacking. Coming from the poorer end of the pond, I had not had access to the sort of education available to richer froggy families. I was, and am, a highly intelligent frog, but much of what I know was self taught (obviously until my enrollment in the Assassin's Academy where I recieved in depth tutoring in my chosen field of study.....but more of that later). I also considered sitting upon a rock in an fetching pose in the hope that he would notice me. I had to put this plan aside, however, because I trembled at the thought that the object of my affections might simply consider me to be an airhead. No. I had to find a way to make him notice me. A way in which I would appear at my most attractive and my most intelligent. Another plan was called for.
For many sleepless nights I sat and pondered how best to engineer the introduction I so desired. In the day I would return to my hiding place in order to observe the comings and goings of the frog I had decided would be my mate. Part of the problem that I faced was that I had no idea how a girl frog goes about attracting a boy frog. Whilst all of the other youngsters had been flirting and entering those transient relationships associated with youth, I was too busy hiding from - and later defeating - my tormentors. I was a late developer when it came to affairs of the heart. I watched him, my mouth going dry whenever another female passed his rock, terrified that someone else might gain his affection whilst I sat quietly in the shadows. I plotted and planned but nothing seemed appropriate. I was beside myself. Then, one day, when I had almost given up hope, circumstances conspired to provide the introduction I had longed for.........but not in the way I had expected............. August 03 My youth, continued......Having finally defeated my siblings, life in the pond became slightly easier for me - despite my small stature. My family, having decided that I was too valuable to torture, decided that it was also necessary to prevent others from tormenting me. I suddenly found myself surrounded with an almost permanent bodyguard. This, in itself, was somewhat off-putting. Honestly, I could barely go to the toilet without one of them coming in with me. Not only did this lead to several rather unpleasant bouts of constipation, but it also rather put a dampener on my love life.
Now, as any young froggy knows, once you have started to grow legs you start to develop an interest in the opposite sex. I lived in the rough end of the pond, but in the process of hiding from my siblings I had, on a number of occasions, found reason to take a trip into the posher parts of town....... As I hopped past one of the more high class dwellings I saw a young male frog sitting on a rock outside his home. He was reading a book on quantuum mechanics. This frog was so gorgeous. His skin glistened a dark, silky green in the sunlight and his expression was one of intense concentration and deep thought. For me, it was love at first sight. I spent many a happy hour watching him as he sat on that rock. Many times I returned, purely for the joy of watching him. I knew that here was a male with an intelligence to rival my own.
And so, I faced my next problem. How to introduce myself to this fabulous frog, without my escort of over-protective relations???? July 28 The cunning plan, part 2............As I approached my erstwhile tormentors, watching them writhe in agony, I was surprised to discover that I felt a small amount of sympathy with their plight. These tender feelings did not, however, serve to divert me from my goal. I had long since realised that gaining revenge over my siblings was not, by itself, a great enough achievement. No. I had to ensure that the torture would at no point begin again. As I have, on previous occasions, evinced - my intellect was the only part of me which was in any way greater or more significant than that of my kin. It should come as no surprise, therefore, that my plan had ramifications beyond mere retribution (although to be fair, that bit was FUN!!!!!).
I looked upon them as they lay, pathetically whining; crying; screaming, on the bank of the pool. I had with me a large jar full of a murky substance which I offered to the largest of my brothers. He looked at me with a great deal of suspicion - no doubt wondering why I would offer to help him - perhaps fearing that I was instead trying to finish him off. Little did he know that the poison had already been administered......
"Look," I stated "I was myself taken ill with these same symptoms and I fear that I would have died had not an old healer happened to be passing the very spot where I lay. He gave me a draught of this self same potion and within a day I recovered. He left me the instructions of how to make this medicine - and told me that without it this illness is almost always terminal."
My siblings still viewed me with distrust but they were terrified of dying and one by one were persuaded to swallow the draught, grimacing all the while at its foul taste. I informed them that they could expect to see an improvement over the next day or so. As a parting shot I gave them to understand that the healer had told me that the disease may well return as it operated in cycles. I made it terribly clear that no one would be given the recipie of the 'miracle cure' and that if they hoped to remain safe from the ravages of this evil disease they must remain on my good side or next time I would refuse to treat them.
I hopped jauntily away knowing that the poison would run its course over the next 24 hours. I must also confess, I suppose, to a chuckle at the faces of my brothers and sisters as they drank the draught which I had so lovingly prepared for them. Of course nothing in it had been in any way toxic - but I had designed it to be as evil smelling and vile to taste as I could possibly manage. Indeed, i believe, that its noxious aroma was capable of wilting the beautiful flora and fauna in the vicinity of my preparation area.
In truth, i justified this last moment of triumph by assuring myself that no one would ever believe in the powers of a medicinal draught that did not taste absolutely repulsive......................... July 26 The cunning plan.... part 1By day, the bullying continued, but I knew that I would have to do something or end up in the froggy-morgue. I avoided my brothers and sisters where possible and began to hatch my plan. After much experimentation I was able to devise the perfect revenge. Although, physically, I was a little small for my age, my intellect was towering. This, of course, set me far above my meat-head kin. In many ways I am grateful for the DNA accident which left my siblings with all of the family brawn divided between them, but settled the vast majority of the brains on me.
As many of you may know, the skin of certain types of frogs exudes a deadly poison. After careful experimentation I was able utilise some of this poison (obtained from a visiting relative - many times removed) to form a solution which, although not deadly, would have many unpleasant side effects if ingested or absorbed through the skin. I tested these side effects very carefully on local humanoids. Obviously i increased the dose greatly. When I was fairly happy with the results I tried the dosage on myself - having first hidden carefully where I knew I could remain undiscovered for a couple of days. The results were devastating. At first I believed that I had taken too much. I could feel death winging her dark way towards me. But then, the symptoms began to ease - and although after a couple of days I was still a little weak and shaky, I could tell that the worst had passed.
I can hear many of you asking why I bothered to ensure that the dosage was safe? Why on earth did I risk my own life by testing my poison on myself? Well, these are both exceedingly good questions, to which I can only answer that some inherent amount of familial loyalty must have been guiding my actions. I could not - despite all of their cruelty - countenance the murder of my own kin. I hated them, but I was not, as yet, willing to kill in revenge.
The next day I arose early and visited my sleeping siblings. Oh so quietly I went from brother to sister, gently anointing each slumbering forehead with a small amount of the solution on the end of a stick. So careful and so quiet was I, that none awoke. I then stepped back to observe my handiwork. Soon they began to wake. The air became thick with the sounds of froggy agony. I watched from afar and chuckled quietly to myself. I followed the progress of the poison - being already familiar with the effects that it had had on myself. I watched as my relatives doubled up in agony. Nausea and diorrhoea were rife. Suffice it to say that the pond had ne'er before smelt so thoroughly unpleasant. I could see that they believed death was on the way - and knowing first hand, as I did, the effects of my solution I knew that it was going to get worse before it got better.
By the evening the bullies were so desperate that they were looking anywhere for help. As I sauntered gently up to their quarters I could see that my time had come. They turned to me with a pathetic look of desperation in their eyes. I could see that it was time to implement phase 2 of my plot........ July 23 The tadpole before the frog.In order that you can understand how I became the frog I am today and the depth of my passion for the total annihilation of THE EVIL ONE, I feel it is necessary to provide you with an insight into my early life.
I was born into a very poor neighbourhood. My mother was very old and she already had several hundred children, many of whom had children - and in some cases grandchildren - of their own. Dad didn't care about us. He knocked Mum up, knocked her about and then walked away with a younger, thinner frog, leaving mum to cope with her latest batch of frogspawn - and later, tadpoles. I don't know if it was because my mother was under-nourished or because of the physical abuse she suffered at the hands of my father, but obviously something went wrong when her body produced me. As a newly hatched tadpole my tail did not develop properly, leaving me unable to compete with the other children in the quest to reach the tastiest morsels of food. This meant that I was a very scrawny tadpole and I didn't begin to grow my legs until weeks after my bigger brothers and sisters.
My brothers and sisters gave me a hell of a lot of stick. They called me "runt" and "legless". I used to hide in a corner of the pond trying to avoid them, but I always knew that at some point I would need to search for some food - and it was at these times when they would find me and make my life a misery. As they grew bigger the bullying became physical. They started to chase me around the pond and would beat me when they caught me. Finally, I had had enough. I knew that I had only two choices - to curl up and die or to fight back. I knew that I was not physically strong enough to beat them so I decided to use my wits instead. I began to hatch a cunning plan................... July 22 The memoirs of Psycho Froggy - Assassin extraordinaire!!!Good evening. I feel that it is time to introduce myself to those of you that I don't already know.
My name is Froggy........Psycho Froggy.
Obviously, this is not the name I was born with. My birth name was far more innocuous. I earned this name and the accompanying reputation after years of trials and tribulations at the Montgomery T. Frogmont School for Trainee Assassins. For many moons I have been a practising assassin. Many prominent frogs have fallen to my blades. Now I am extremely wealthy. I have everything I have ever wanted. Well, almost everything.........
I dream of early retirement and birthing my spawn in my luxurious pool (all mod-cons fitted). However, before I can retire I have one final mission, the elimination of my arch enemy. I have stalked him in secret for a number of weeks and hatched a cunning plan for his utter annihilation. But more of that at a later date.
Obviously, because of my profession, my true identity must remain a secret. As a result, the charming specimen of froghood on my profile is not in fact my true self.
For the majority of my working life I have operated in secret. I have decided, however, that this, my final and most challenging mission, should be publicised and I should share with the world my inevitable triumph. As such I will enter my story on to the World Wide Web in the form of this blog. I hope that many of you will join me over the next weeks or months to support me in the culmination of my life's work.
And now 'tis time to bid you all adieu......... |
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